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guts, or balls

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Old Dec 7, 2005 | 08:33 AM
  #1  
bigunner1's Avatar
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a friend of mine emailed me this, it may be old,,,,but i never heard it before lol.


GUTS or *****?
We've all heard about people having guts or *****. But do you really
know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the
definition for each is listed below ....

GUTS - is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being
assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?"

***** - is coming home late after a night out with the guys,
smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your
wife on the *** and having the ***** to say: "You're next."

I hope this clears up any confusion on the subject.
Old Dec 7, 2005 | 08:36 AM
  #2  
Prolifik's Avatar
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lool
Old Dec 7, 2005 | 08:39 AM
  #3  
ZachCHartwell's Avatar
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haha
Old Dec 7, 2005 | 08:46 AM
  #4  
theboy's Avatar
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Nice! [img]smile.gif[/img]
Old Dec 7, 2005 | 11:09 AM
  #6  
Aescu-DOUG's Avatar
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haha nice
Old Dec 7, 2005 | 11:19 AM
  #7  
Cavalier Chunk's Avatar
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mu hahahaha... guts is going up to a group of kids and starting something.

***** is lipping off your boss/service lady. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

i love buggin her threw a snow ball at her the other day... she was so gonan kill me. [img]tongue.gif[/img]
Old Dec 7, 2005 | 08:02 PM
  #8  
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Along the same lines.

2 guys were hanging out at the bar and it was getting really late. The one guy is complaining that his wife is gonna kill him when he gets home and the other guys asks why?

"well I usually drive home and I cut the engine and lights and coast into the driveway so as not to wake her up"

"I take off my shoes before I go in the door and I keep a can of WD-40 in the hedges just incase the hinges squeak"

"I get undressed downstairs and slowly creep up the stairs and ease myself ever so gently into bed and under the covers but she ALWAYS wakes up and startes bitching and screaming at me about "where have you been?" "why are you so late?" etc...etc...etc...

His buddy laughs and tells him your going about it all wrong. This is how you do it

"I drive home and when I get close I rev the snot out of the engine, honk the horn and screech to a halt."

"I ding the doorbell really fast a half dozen times, clomp up the stairs, throw my boots across the room, tear off my clothes and jump into bed."

I spoon up next to her, squeeze her *** and whisper in her ear "Hey baby....how bout some?"

She ALWAYS pretends she still asleep.

Works EVERY time.
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