I am generally a jackass, and always answer the phone with something dumb.

When i was at home, one buddy ripped of a line something like

Carls abortion clinic, you rape em we scrape em....

only it was like 30 seconds long, and i can't think of it...apparenlty it's really old, anyone know it?

 

Don't know that one, but an old favorite is:

"Hardcore's Mortuary, you stab'em we slab'em" [img]tongue.gif[/img]

Gene

 

I like Homers.....

"You'll have to speak up I'm wearing a towel."

 

hmm the mortuary one was also thrown out at the table once i stopped laughing from the line he threw out there....but someone must know the abortion clinic line

Hmm i think it went like so:

City Abortions, you rape em, we scrape, no fetus has ever beat us, how can i help you?

but i'm not sure, seems like his was longer

[ May 18, 2004, 04:05 PM: Message edited by: Hardcore Rock Superstar ]

 

ok that must be it, i found a list of them now:

Joe's Taxidermy! You snuff 'em we stuff 'em.
City Morgue! You bag 'em we tag 'em.
Joe's elevator! We're good till the last drop.
Mandy's Ranch! You have the bucks we have the ****s.
Joe's Strip-O-Gram! You flash the cash we flash some ***.
Joe's Mortuary. You kill 'em, we chill 'em.
Joe's Mortuary. You stab 'em, we slab 'em.
Joe's Abortion Clinic. You rape 'em, we scrape 'em.
Joe's Abortion Clinic. No fetus can beat us.
Joe's crematorium - you choke 'em we smoke 'em.
Mary's cat house, one of her kittens speaking!!
Murray's riding stables, this is the *** speaking.
Joe's Creamatorium! You kill em, we grill em!
"Nobody here but us fuzzy-headed mutants"
City Homicide... Our day begins when yours ends.
Betty Massage Palour. We never rub you the wrong way.
Turner Mortuary. You plug 'em, we plant 'em.
Harry's stud farm - where the customer comes first.
Joe's Brothel. First served, first come.
Smith's summer home, some aren't.
Smith's mule shed, which *** do you want to speak to?
Municipal Sewer Department, we've had about enough **** from you.
State Pen Executioner. You try 'em, we fry 'em.
The Pearly Gates, Peter speaking.
The White House, Millie speaking.
Geniuses are us, this is Albert.
City Sperm Bank. You wack it. We pack it.
City Mortuary: We drain 'em, dress 'em, dig 'em, and drop 'em.

 

Heaven, God speaking.

 

Wopper, whats your beaf?

-db

 

Jims Blackmail System. This conversation will be recorded. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use your voice for illegal purposes. Remember to speak clearly

 

haha my friends inres would always answer the phone Joe's Taxidermus you kill 'em will fill 'em. [img]graemlins/dunno.gif[/img] whether it makes sense or not it pissed off n confused a lot of people lol And then of course my across the hall neighbor made his answering machine an advertisement for the Oshawa City Morgue, but he made it REALLY realistic lol If I didnt know his voice I'd beleive it lol.

The best wrong number so far I've got at home here is "This is doctor Coward calling for Tee Chee, we would just like to confirm their appointment on such n such a day" They've called twice that i have answered first time was hilarious second time wasn't so hilarious but it twas still funny. lol

[ May 19, 2004, 12:15 AM: Message edited by: 131.7 dB Z24 ]