MsSassmaster

I know that this is an oldie, but thought you boys would like a laugh

AND NOW WE WILL ANSWER THE ETERNAL QUESTION …
WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed, I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens
will be free to cross roads without
having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken
crossed the road. Someone told us that
the chicken crossed the road, and that
was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX
It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSAIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion
and we were quite justified in
dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious?
Can't you people see the plain truth in
front of your face? The chicken was going to the
"other side." That's what "they" call it-the
"other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay.
And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too.
I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this
abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that.

FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes.
How many more chickens have to cross
before you believe it?

FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned
that the chicken crossed the road reveals
your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 2000, which will
not only cross roads, but will lay eggs,
file your important documents, and balance your
checkbook and Internet Explorer is an
inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road
or did the road move beneath
the chicken?

BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken.
What do you mean by
"chicken"? Could you define "chicken" please?

LOUIS FARRAKHAN
The road, you will see, represents the black man.
The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to
trample him and keep him down.

THE BIBLE
And God came down from the heavens, and He said
unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road."
And the chicken crossed the road, and there
was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS
I missed one?

rabbitman

Man do I miss him on X files. That show went into oblivion.